Tag Archives: humour

Little Drummer Boy #9

There was no way I could not include a Chipmunk version of this song…just no way.

I will forever be an ALVIN fan.

Related Posts…

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Time for some smiling…

1.

The local news station was interviewing an 80-year-old lady because she had just gotten married for the fourth time.

The interviewer asked her questions about her life, about what it felt like to be marrying again at 80, and then about her new husband’s occupation. “He’s a funeral director,” she answered. “Interesting,” the newsman thought. He then asked her if she wouldn’t mind telling him a little about her first three husbands and what they did for a living.

She paused for a few moments, needing time to reflect on all those years.

After a short time, a smile came to her face and she answered proudly, explaining that she had first married a banker when she was in her 20′s, then a circus ringmaster when in her 40′s, and a preacher when in her 60′s, and now – in her 80′s – a funeral director The interviewer looked at her, quite astonished, and asked why she had married four men with such diverse careers.

(Wait for it…)

She smiled and explained: “I married

One for the money,

Two for the show,

Three to get ready,

And four to go!”

2.

A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet
pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird’s chest.

After a moment or two, the vet shook his head and sadly said, “I’m sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has   passed away.” The distressed woman wailed, “Are you sure?”   “Yes, I am sure. Your duck is dead,” replied the vet.

“How can you be so sure?” she protested. “I mean you haven’t done any testing on him or anything.
He might just be in a coma or something.”

The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He returned a few minutes later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck’s owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked up at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head.

The vet patted the dog on the head and took it out of the room. A few minutes later he returned with a cat. The cat jumped on the table and also delicately sniffed the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room.

The vet looked at the woman and said, “I’m sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck.”

The vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman.. The duck’s owner, still in shock, took the bill. “$150!” she cried, “$150 just to tell me my duck is dead!”

The vet shrugged, “I’m sorry. If you had just taken my word for it, the bill would have been $20, but with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it’s now $150.”

3. Now meet the dog who apparently loves the water, can swim but chooses not to…

 

Summer Lovin’ ?????

Summer lovin’…maybe not as it is winter here, but there was still a whole lot of frisky business happening.

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This video…watch until the end. It had me laughing out loud at the end.

WPC: Summer Loving

Wordless Wednesday

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The Honey Badger Houdini

Before we get settled watching this amazing Honey Badger…just a reminder that today is Earth Day. To learn more about the history of Earth Day and what it means today click on the image below to visit National Geographic News.

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When I first saw this I could not stop laughing at how time and time again this Honey Badger foiled all attempts to keep him in. He used tree branches, so they got rid of the trees. Then he piled up the rocks against the wall so they took away the rocks. He was not foiled at all, he made his own rocks from mud and piled those up.

I dare you not to giggle at this wonderful creature.

Just shows you doesn’t it…there is ALWAYS a way if you want it bad enough.

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Sunday Post: Easter

Although Sunday has come and gone here…I couldn’t resist taking part in Jake’s Easter post.

img035I thought I would start off my Easter post with an ‘awwwwww’ moment.

Well…a couple of them actually.

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Then a touch of humour with a mix of creativity…who can resist a fluffy bunny ???

Jo Bryant

And some more Easter fun…

So yes I know this has actually nothing to do with Easter…but…I couldn’t help myself once I started.

I think I like being a billboard girl.
I think I like being a billboard girl. And they got it wrong. I could !!!!

Hmmm…well you just know I didn’t stop there !

I could always be an artist muse if the billboard thing didn't work out.
I could always be an artist’s muse if the billboard thing didn’t work out.
Once the artist found fame it might be amusing to find oneself hanging in a gallery.
Once the artist found fame it might be amusing to find oneself hanging in a gallery.

I thought in ending I should probably get back to the subject of Easter.

Bunny Jo
Now I have pink ears and feet !!!

I hope the Bunny was good to everyone. Time for me to hop off and do something like walk the dog.

But before I do…I would like everyone to remember this Easter the bunnies who live lives in cages in laboratories all around the world. Many put through very cruel treatments so that people feel safe using cosmetics. Luckily countries like India and others are now banning these practises. I wish I could say New Zealand was part of the movement but it isn’t. If you can take just a minute and e-mail your MP [wherever you live], and tell them it is not okay to torture animals, I know they would thank you if they could.

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What Energy Companies Are Really Thinking

If energy companies actually told the truth, it might look something like this !!!!

Related posts about oils spills and New Zealand

 

Wait for it…

It is Dog Farting Awareness Day !!

Yes…it is a DAY !! So Chevvy thought we should acknowledge it…though she thinks that every day is Dog Farting Awareness Day.

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However…I actually think it should be ANIMAL FARTING AWARENESS DAY, as we have a couple of other wee stinkies in the house !!!

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Charlie’s favourite place to fart is right by me…on the bed, in the middle of the night.

Jackie is much more ladylike about it…she does the sneaky kind.

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All poor Crash can do is look on in horror as the only family member who doesn’t fart…well that we notice anywho !!!

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Even I have been known to drop the odd one occasionally.  Just ask my kids !!! I may look all innocent and sweet…but there is a reason I drive with the window down.

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I dare you NOT to laugh !

And on a cute note…

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And on a completely self serving note…Chronicles is in the Australian Best blogs Competition this year. If you want to vote for me and the blog in the PEOPLE’S CHOICE AWARDS…click on the badge below and go nuts !!! The link will take you to the page…scroll down in until you hit ‘C’ and we are listed under CHRONICLES OF ILLUSIONS. Click the box…then [and I am sorry about this] you have to scroll down and keep clicking next until you get to the page where you fill in your name and e-mail address.

The fur babies and I would like to say thanks in advance !!!!

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Just playing around…

So this is me…if I was a WILD THING…which of course I am not !! Or…am I ????

Jo is a WILD THING
I think this expresses me perfectly !