This is just some of the mail that gets filtered directly to my junk mail box.
Thought it might give you a laugh.
• Meet a lovely Russian woman today (do I need to learn the language?)
• Super quality wireless spy cameras (to spy on the lovely Russian woman?)
• Luck will knock at your door (with the spy camera maybe I can check it out first)
• Urgent. Return to school with a Grant. (I’d prefer to go with a Dean or a Sam maybe…)
• Win laser eye surgery (like I need to read better to see this shit)
• Meet me tonight (from Kelly !!!!!!!!!)
• Get up to $1,000 in as little as one hour. (can I have maybe $2,000 in 2 hours please?)
• Relax, your in the Bahamas (not the last time I checked. I think I would notice something like that – oh, maybe I do need the free laser eye surgery – AND IT’S YOU’RE, NOT YOUR !!!!!!!)
• Get the training you want as a pharmacy assistant (seeing as I can’t see all that well until I get the eye surgery, MAYBE I should pass on that)
• I tried to reach you (I’ve tried to reach me at times – let it go)
• On-line Pramacy 51% SALE (I think they started the sale early – only using 51% of the word.
• Jo, apply now and your in – US green card program (Oh dear – but I like NZ)
• Sexy and supportive bras (Who told you I need support?????)
• Right bra right attitude (Enough with discussing my sagging boobs)
• See your friends houses with google earth (creepy…but, hang on. Can I see inside and what they are up to ?)
• Hidden cameras (oh – maybe if I combine that with google earth)
• You’ve been selected (oh that happened long ago – that’s why I’m hiding out in NZ)
• 51% 0ff at blue lotus tattoo (hmmmm…51% – now where have I heard that before?)
So – apparantly I need to meet women, go back to school with a guy I’ve never met, spy on my friends, get a tattoo, eye surgery, a better bra, cheap drugs, and a hidden camera. Wow – maybe I should look out for a bad credit loan – I’m sure I saw one of those the other day !!!!
Chronicles of Illusions 