It is way overdue, like the tomorrow that never seems to come quick enough, but perhaps that is the way of it. It needed to gather its pieces together like a snowball rolling down a mountain. With each turn, the pieces are packed tighter together so that at the end of its journey, little withstands its impact.
The #Metoo campaign has grown to encompass both women and men coming together to say: “Enough!” It gladdens me to see people from all ethnicities, generations, ways of life opening up about their experiences. It is hard to do. I know.
The shame you feel. In my generation, the thought was that you probably deserved it. You ask for it in the way you dress. You keep quiet for the most part. You beat yourself up. You wonder. Could I have done something to stop it? You wonder. Were they right? You wonder. Did you cause it? Was the dress you wore too provocative? Did you drink more than you should have? You berate yourself for making the decision that getting from a car park to your house at night was safe enough. After all, you have done it hundreds of times in the last years.
You keep the memory of what happened closed off in a tiny compartment, deep, so deep down inside. By locking up the memory, the voice that taunts you will gradually die away you reason. It never does.
Then one morning you see that others have done the same as you. The blame, the shame, the need to keep it hidden, was not only yours to claim. And the numbers begin to mount of brave people facing their demon. Facing the belief that they were to blame and casting it aside for all eternity.
It was way overdue.
I can’t disagree, Jo.
I kept the memory of what happened to me as a boy hidden except for the time I told my wife, but then I opened up on the blog and the weight lifted.
#MeToo is indeed way overdue.
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It is amazing the damage we do to ourselves over things like this by keeping it hidden. That old cliche really is true. The truth almost always sets you free.
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You are a brave woman.
Hope this piece is cathartic for you Jo.
Sending big hugs. X
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Thanks Toni. Actually not so brave, just too old to care what people think anymore.
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So true Jo – things were so different back then. It’s nice to see perspectives change and what used to be acceptable no longer is. Let’s hope the movement continues
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Incredible to see the numbers continuing to rise.
Well said …
Isadora 😎
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You commented once (maybe more than once) on my blog way back in 2014. Last night I was be-bopping around in my blog, bouncing from one old post to another and noticed your comment, then went to see if you were still blogging. And here you are! I’m very sorry about Crash, he sounds like a great bird. And I haven’t tried to catch up with your life since then, but think this post, so recent, so relevant deserved a comment. I too stayed quiet because I didn’t think the things that happened to me were that unusual. Or life changing. Still. I finally blogged about it too. How can we not?
Anyway, I hope your life has been joyous since we last “talked.”
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Not always but there were and are enough joyous moments to make it all it needs to be. I wish you the same.
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